Tag Archive | past life

Past Life Regression on 3-11-2018

I had a long and really interesting past life regression done via Zoom with wonderfully supportive Ron Amit of Transformotion.org last Sunday.  Ron lives in southern Oregon and I’m in northern New Mexico, but thanks to technology, he can do hypnotic regressions for people located anywhere.  I mention this not only because he’s great at what he does, but because I know people in small towns may not have a qualified hypnotherapist where they live.

Initially, the purpose of this session was to try to help me be able to trance channel more smoothly.  Ron interviewed me for a long time before the hypnosis session to find out what things we needed to touch upon.  That part isn’t in the 2 hours and 54 minute long video.  We decided not only to work on trying to get my channeling to be smoother, but also work on my 22+ years long CONSTANT headache and neck pain from neck damage as I already knew I’d been killed by my neck in numerous lives and there was trauma carryover.  We ended up finding out helpful information about a lot of stuff I deal with.  Ron regressed me not only to some past lives (a Native American in the Southwest killed during a battle by a spear or arrow to the neck, a pirate in the Caribbean who starved to death in prison, a young Buddhist monk in Nepal/Tibet, and Sarah Good during the Salem Witch Trials) but we also did a lot in the life-between-lives state with my Council of 7.  Halcyon is my main spirit guide and kind of head of the Council, and then there are 6 other guides.  A new one I “met” during the session is named Tomas.

Now, what was frustrating is that my Council of 7 wasn’t as forthcoming about some important information as I’d hoped.  I seemed to be a bit blocked.  I’m guessing that the reason for that is that if we are still in the learning process regarding major life lessons that are charted for us, we are not allowed to know what is in the Akashic Records regarding the issues.  It’s kind of like “cheating” to see things we’re currently in the midst of experiencing/learning…or in the future planned for us.  We can see stuff that has long since happened already.

Anyway, if you have HOURS to kill, here is my session.  I hesitated to blog this as it’s very personal, but I think it’ll help some people who’ve never had a hypnotic regression session see what it’s like.  I find past life (and life-between-life) therapy to be very beneficial and fascinating.  A simple example is that I used to have this phobia about being killed by my neck while in bed and I couldn’t say or hear the words, “I love you.”  I would literally physically cringe.  I had a life hundreds of years ago where my husband strangled me in bed during a jealous rage (I was pregnant and he mistakenly thought I’d cheated on him and that the baby was another man’s.) while saying…over and over…”I love you.”  I was able to release all of that after seeing and healing that life.

I realized from this that I have a long history of doing what was expected of me…of putting the feeling of responsibility above my true desires, which is honorable, but not good for me in the long run.

In light,

Atheria

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Soul vs. Practicality

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I just got back from 2 days in Taos, discounting travel time…after driving 90 mph for 4.5 hours.  It was magical, as always.

I’m sitting here…home…but not “home”.  What have I done?  I fully expect a high level job offer from XXXX (can’t name it but it’s a great place in the Denver area) this coming week and I will be thrilled (and relieved after over 4 months of looking) but there is a tug at my soul.  It’s name is Taos.

I’m going to miss waving at strangers as they pass by in their cars and trucks.  I’m going to miss the deadbeats who brag that they’ve not worked in 14 months, hate the government, but are on food stamps (keep in mind I’m on them) and give tips on how to get the most out of food stamps with half off coupons.  Or the ones the locals told me about who stop by daily to bum a cigarette.  I’m going to miss the people who have walked away from high level jobs/lives to devote themselves to traveling the world doing yoga service (working for room and board along the way).  I’m going to miss the people who just “happened” to pass through Taos on their way to somewhere else and knew they couldn’t leave…like the Seattle artist I met last April who, on his way back from an art tour in London, fell in love with Taos and never returned to Seattle.  Or, the woman I met at The Snowmansion hostel years ago who decided, on a whim, to veer off and check out Taos on her way back to her home in Wyoming from Sedona…who went back to Wyoming, quit her high paying government job, sold her property, and moved to Taos with no idea how she would survive but knew “It will work out.”

I’m going to miss the people intently photographing sunflowers by the side of the road.  I’m going to miss the bad singers in Taos Plaza blasting their voices over speakers with tip jars out…but…so happy to be singing with joy.  I’m going to miss the artists set up in the middle of coffee house parking lots painting what the bright sunlight at 7,000′ shows.  I’m going to miss Taos’ night sky with billions of stars.  Have you ever seen the Milky Way?  I have.  I’m going to miss the quiet.  I’m going to miss the voice of Taos Mountain and La Bruja (witch) that appears at the top of the next door mountain peak…broomstick and all (a stereotype I don’t love but she’s cute with her pigtail blowing in the wind).  I’m going to miss the bartering between locals as they each support each other.   I’m going to miss CPAs/marathoners  who tell me that their REAL job is to be in Taos.  I’m going to miss the strangers in dreadlocks who offer to make me coffee.  I’m going to miss the guy from Scandinavia who ended up in Taos because he threw a dart at a map on the wall and it landed on Taos.  I’m going to miss baristas and German girls in hostels who break into song.  I’m going to miss the fact that everyone is either related to each other or knows each other, and looks out for each other.

I’m going to miss the stories…the wonderful and magical stories of how people ended up in Taos.  When you say to someone, “This place is SO special and weird” and they look at you knowingly, and nod in agreement.  I’m going to miss talking with people who are in Taos to attend the Earthship Academy.  Yes, there is an Earthship Academy.  And then there was the couple who’ve lived in the Taos area their entire lives, yet still drive out to the Rio Grande Gorge Bridge to eat dinner and watch the sunset.  I talked to a very elderly man yesterday who told me Taos called him 22 years ago.  He was at Wired, eating a scone or something, and reading the New Yorker.  He told me (after hearing my 1998 story) that my story reminded him of Mabel Dodge Lujan.  Then, of course, there is Dennis Hopper…who, while looking for places to film Easy Rider, fell so in love with Taos that he lived there for 40 years.

I am crying as I type this.  I do love Colorado.  It’s beautiful and full of opportunity and welcoming people (despite the current deluge of 10,000 per month).  I’m very alone in the world with no one else to rely on and have to take care of myself financially…and Denver is an economic hot spot.  At this point, at 49 and alone for 49 years, I can’t expect that to change.  Hope just creates letdown.  I have to plan for my future/later years.  I don’t want to struggle in Taos with 3 part-time jobs with no benefits.  With tears rolling down my cheeks…I feel stuck.  I know that my ashes will be sprinkled in Taos someday.  I just hope that’s not too late for me to be there.

During my weekend in Taos I got a lot of power numbers, especially 111.

My friend in Massachusetts visited my grave today and placed a sunflower.  As if I wasn’t already crying.  Thank you, Tumeria.  A sunflower turns its face to the sun.  Very symbolic.

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Melancholy,

Atheria

Past lives, current pain, and forgiveness

There is a great weekly meeting here in Albuquerque called “Spirit Presents ABQ” where there is either a speaker/presenter each week, or an open forum where channels, psychics, etc. can practice their gifts in a supportive environment.  (Email Barbara at spiritpresentsabq@gmail.com if you want to be added to her weekly emailed newsletter.)  Due to my schedule, I don’t go very often, but felt a strong pull to go to tonight’s practice session.  Earlier in the day I felt that I wouldn’t do any channeling, but may just give some mini psychic readings.  I was wrong.

There were 6 of us who showed up tonight, with me being the last arrival.  I sat in between a guy and gal and really didn’t expect to do much because my 20+ year long constant head and neck pain has been really, really bad lately and exhausting (don’t know why I got so much worse last July, but I did).  Barbara led an  opening meditation and both she and another channel gave channeled messages.  When she asked if anyone else needed to channel, I didn’t say anything because I wasn’t feeling it.  But then the empath to my right felt spirit with me and spoke up and said that I had major energies wanting to come through, which triggered me to go into trance pretty quickly.  (Later on, the man to my left said that the moment I walked into the room and sat down, he felt MAJOR energy with me.)  Because Barbara, when she first greeted me tonight, asked if I could ask my guides to be more gentle with me during channeling than they normally are, my session tonight was “better” than normal and a bit more gentle.  (You can see some old videos of me on my Atheria PsychicMedium YouTube channel in trance and it can be pretty scary to watch as I look like I’ve got cerebral palsy or that I’m having a stroke or something.)  That being said, the first channeling I did was very painful due to the tension in my body and the movement/positions my head and neck were put into (have a neck injury) and I couldn’t do on too long due to the extra pain.  I do wish I’d been tape recorded though, as some important political stuff was said by a group that referred to themselves as “The Golden Dawn but not The Golden Dawn known for magick”.  This group said they were connected to Sirius.

Because I was wiped out afterward, and complaining about how bad my head and neck hurt, the kind man to my left asked if he could do some energy work on me and, of course, I said yes.  He took my left hand and I could feel some gentle flowing/shifting…it’s hard to explain.  After a few minutes he said that a LONG time ago, pre Middle Ages, I had been beheaded and the chopping off of my head didn’t go smoothly…so it was a horrible execution gone wrong.  (I have been killed by my neck  in numerous past lives, but this one I wasn’t familiar with, although I was beheaded in another life too.)  He said that I needed to forgive the people who killed me in that life and my other lives.  (My hanging on July 19, 1692 during the Salem Witch Trials is another biggie.)  It was also mentioned that I needed to forgive myself because there were things I did wrong too.  He said that I had been killed because of my beliefs, which confirmed what a fellow channel friend in Los Angeles said to me years ago, “You’ve been killed many times because you had beliefs that were ahead of your time and not the norm.  But, this is finally the life where you can speak your truth and not be punished/killed.”  I can’t remember now exactly what he said, but when he mentioned something about there being a bridge between the past life he saw and now, I was hit with emotion and started to cry.  The word BRIDGE is major for me.  Many years ago at the start of my journey, I had a “dream” with James Van Praagh in it where he walked up to me and said, “You are a bridge for spirit.”  That’s why my old email address was spiritbridge@yahoo.com (deleted now) and that’s why this blog’s address is what it is.

In honesty, I said that I carry A LOT of anger with me regarding being hung during the Salem Witch Trials, for example, so it would not surprise me if I’m also carrying anger from other brutal deaths in my past…that are “bridged” to my current neck and head pain.  I was told I’ve really got to work on forgiving all involved, and myself.  Then the people in the circle addressed the issue of WHY my channeling is always so physically stressful, difficult, and dramatic.  They made me aware that instead of just letting the energies I’m channeling flow through me, I seemed to be pushing them out or something.  They pointed out that perhaps I felt FEAR of being persecuted for my channeling and was kind of blocking the energies instead of TRUSTING and LETTING GO OF CONTROL to allow a smoother flow.  I will admit that (1) I am a control freak, so totally letting go is an issue and (2) I have major trust issues in general, and do question what comes through and debate with “them” in my head before any words come out.  I carry on full fledged arguments behind the scenes in my head.  I’m so afraid of not being believed or that my unseen friends will be wrong, I totally jam up the energy…which causes the contorting, gasping, locked up muscles, etc.  After coaching me a bit on how to just ALLOW…I tried to channel again to see if I could get it to be easier/smoother.  Sure enough, it was easier.  It wasn’t perfect and Barbara had to remind me to breathe when she could see that I was starting to hold back/control, but it was definitely better than my usual sessions.

Doing this work, it’s so hard to trust what is happening!  You keep asking yourself, “Is this just me making up stuff?”  But, during my second try, my unseen friends (a different group from the Pleiades that knew the first group) gave 100% accurate spirit messages to 3 people in the room!  Add to that, the wonderful note I got today on Instagram about a prediction I made a year ago or so that just came true…and…my confidence is building!  I question all the time, “Can I really do this?”  So, it’s nice to get confirmation that I’m not talking out my butt.  Ha!

The interesting thing is that afterward, my 20+ year long migraine shifted.  My “normal” pain is a constant really bad pressure sensation deep inside my brain pushing out in all directions, with it being worse in my occipital region.  Add to that the burning at the base of my skull and in certain parts of my neck and the occasional stabbing in my neck/traps, and things are just lovely…not.  Anyway, my head still felt pressure pain, but it was a little lower and there was a throbbing more concentrated pain on the left side of my head.  Any change in the type of head pain is a good sign in my book, after 20 years.  I think I’m clearly onto something.  I need to buckle down and work on forgiving those who killed me, forgive myself, and stop fearing my gift and letting it flow.  I must continue to speak my truth and another guy tonight suggested pulling the blue flame into my throat chakra.  When I’m starting to channel, I often start coughing and that is not a coincidence.

It’s late and I think I’m forgetting other important stuff that happened tonight.  But, I left with some important things to think about and work on.  I’m so glad I went to the practice session!  Of course, now I’m questioning if I should be leaving Albuquerque next month as planned.  But, as a couple of them said, if Colorado doesn’t work out, I can always come back.  True!  I have this weird feeling that this job in my beloved Taos that I’ve written off as not going to come through, will come through just as I’m about to move do the Denver/Boulder area.  Now that could just be me worrying though, and not a message.  LOL!  I have a strong connection to the Rocky Mountains from Colorado down into New Mexico and said under hypnosis last August that eventually I wouldn’t live in just one place, that I’d travel a lot for my spiritual work…especially between Colorado and New Mexico.  My gut does feel that is going to happen.  I would like to mention that when John Denver wrote “Rocky Mountain High”…he was actually in mountains near Taos, New Mexico, not Colorado! 🙂 My magical Taos!

The moral of this long post is:  Do not hold onto anger as it causes many health problems.  Speak your truth.  Trust in your higher self and guides.  And being a control freak just causes stress.

In light,

Atheria

P.S.  Oh, when I got into my car to head home after the meeting tonight, I looked at my car’s odometer to see a 444!  Angel sign! 🙂

 

Life Between Lives Hypnotic Regression Session on Aug. 28, 2015

I have been wanting a life-between-lives hypnosis regression session for years, so when my fellow psychic medium friend, Renee Buck (www.whispersfromthelight.com) stayed with me for 2 days while driving across country and offered a session, I said yes.  I am dealing with an almost 20 years long constant pain issue (along with other things) that has gotten much worse since the beginning of July, so I was hoping for some insight about my head/neck hell.  I already knew that I’ve been killed by my neck numerous times, including on July 19, 1692 in Salem during the Witch Trials.

The session was fascinating, emotionally hard at times as realizations came flooding through, physically hard (major aching in my arms and legs), and jaw dropping with WOW moments.  Renee took me back to my childhood, birth experience, and while I was in the womb.  A neck related thing showed up when I was around 4.  I was with my mom (assuming dad and sister too, but don’t know) at a petting zoo type place (may have been Lollipop Farm in the Rochester, NY area) when somehow I fell or got pushed down by a little herd of goats or sheep or something.  I can remember the panic and all I could see was stomachs and legs of the animals as they walked over me.  Mom reached down in and yanked me out to safety.  But, I sustained some damage to my neck at C5-C6.  I’m getting new x-rays and a new MRI tomorrow, but do know that there is a herniated disc at C5-C6 that showed up years ago, and my neck suddenly bends in the wrong direction at that point.

In the womb things were okay except that I could feel my mother’s anxiety.  I knew she wanted me, but was very anxious and nervous about becoming a mother.  Before birth, I was really upset.  I felt abandoned by my guides and felt that they had coerced me into taking on way too may difficulties and challenges in this life.  I did not want to be born.  I wanted desperately to back out of the agreement.  That’s probably why mom was in labor for so many hours.  I was refusing to come out.  She was heavily drugged during it, so when I did finally pop out, I don’t remember interacting with her right away.  The lights were so bright!  The sudden light in my face and loud noises bothered me.  I recalled one male doctor and 3 nurses.

Renee then took me back further and there was this moment when I saw this garden that I described as an English type garden with lots of manicured bushes and such, but not as many flowers, but when Renee said, “Or like France” I suddenly knew I was seeing Versailles’ gardens!  I have LONG felt I lived at the Palace of Versailles long ago due to a life I glimpsed in 1988.  At one point during the session as Renee was leading me to deeper levels, I walked down this glass staircase that was pretty…with wooden railings.

Renee then suggested I go to a past life where I also had psychic gifts, and used them in a beneficial way.  I was suddenly seeing what looked like a monastery in Tibet, but felt Nepal.  I may have been near the border as I have a strong connection to the Ganesh Himal region.  I saw my feet and I was wearing sandals made of yak skin/leather with horse hair twine stuff tying them together.  I was dressed in tan/orange robes.  I was a 14 year old Buddhist monk.  I was on my way to the market to pick up some supplies for the monastery as they requested the younger monks do chores like that.  But, I liked going to the market because there was a girl I loved from afar who worked there.  She had long dark hair.  I pined for her, but knew that we could never be a couple.  I had been chosen to be a monk because of “seer” qualities I had shown when very young.  I had dreams that came true, etc.  I had been considered to be gifted and special.  I had been “chosen” and I respected the responsibility bestowed upon me.  I took it very seriously and put duty and honor before personal desire and knew I was giving up ever having a normal life.  But, I loved her…and it made my heart ache.  I went through a special “ordination” ceremony when I was 16 and then we jumped forward to when I was about 65.  I had become a very respected teacher and taught other young monks about how to attain connection to the divine.  I taught with compassion and not a heavy hand.  There was always a slight glimmer of sadness about the girl, but I accepted the sacrifices I made as I accomplished a lot that was important.  She did end up getting married to someone else and had a nice life.  I died at age 72 in year 1147 after an illness.  On my deathbed I was surrounded by chanting monks and I meditated on the bardo.  There were lit candles around the room.

After I died, I went out into the universe and saw billions of stars.  Two guides then greeted me and led me, one on each side, by my shoulders as we flew to the Other Side.  There was an “Emerald City’ type crystal building that emitted green light and as we floated along the path leading to the huge double doors, I looked down and realized that the path was made of water!  We were “walking on water”!  I was led into this large, all white room with a crescent shaped desk.  I stood facing the table (the arc of the crescent faced me) as the 2 spirit guides stayed with me but stepped slightly behind me.  At the table were 7 beings.  The one in the middle was quite a bit bigger than the 6 others, and felt male.  I say “felt male” because the inner aura was pink.  He had long-ish blonde hair and blue eyes.  They all wore white judge type robes.  His name was Halcyon.  I found out that I have carried something over from that Buddhist life that I shouldn’t have.  I have thought that I needed to go through life alone in order to be successful with my spiritual work.  I subconsciously have felt that a partner would be a distraction and hold me back.  I have felt I’ve needed to sacrifice like the Buddhist monk did…which is incorrect.

It also came up that I knew Renee from another one (at least I think it was a separate life) of my Buddhist past lives.  I knew of 2 before yesterday.  She had been my teacher in one.

Also at the table was Lisette, my fairy guide (her purpose is to lighten me up and make me laugh), and Latho, who is more stern and hits me in the back/right part of my head when I’m being stupid about something.  The soul I know as my Grandpa Slovik was there (in the room, not at the table), Uncle Chuckie, an ex boss named Don Kline, and 2 Spiritualist reverends from my past, Frances Scher and Eveliani (Evelyn) Chaneske (Gilbert).

It came out that my serious health challenges for years DO have a purpose.  Their purpose is to teach me compassion for others so that when I teach, I don’t teach too sternly.  It was made clear that my true work is as a teacher.  I was told that the things I’m doing now to try to help my health are the right things to do.  Whether I’ll ever be totally out of pain was kind of vague, but I will be getting help…and at least will improve.

I was told that it’s true I’m very connected to the entire Rocky Mountains region…Colorado and New Mexico.  I will finally be freed up to leave Albuquerque, energetically, after I get the help I need for my head and neck issue.  I was told that my presentation at the November NM UFO/Paranormal Forum will lead to my real work taking off.  I will be traveling around to speak and teach in upcoming years and will get invitations to appear at various events around the country.  Supposedly, I’ve already been teaching at all of the office jobs I’ve ever had as you can teach without realizing it.

Just very briefly, my Salem Witch Trials life did come up and it seems I was Sarah Good.  Reading about her life is upsetting.  I did NOT kill animals as they said.  Under hypnosis in 2002 I remember doing herbal healing work on animals in the woods.

Sarah Good Grave Marker

Sarah Good Grave Marker

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Sarah_Good_(Salem_witch_trials)

Supposedly, I also knew Renee in that life.  She was a sympathizer in the “audience” and was young.  I got the name Gretchen Winthrop for her.  I do know that being hung in that life is affecting my neck now.  I’ve tried to release it, but it’s been hard.  I was told I need to let go of the anger and hatred toward those who killed me in order to let go of the energetic neck trauma.  THAT will be a challenge.

Supposedly I have indeed 2 past lives in New Mexico.  One as a Colorado Ute where I came down into the Taos area to trade, and one as a Mescalero Apache.  I was told that I was brought to New Mexico to heal.

I am probably forgetting stuff that came up yesterday, but it was very helpful and eye opening.  I gained a lot of clarity.

In light,

Atheria

My Salem Witch Trials Murder on July 19, 1692

The anniversary of my murder is coming up on Sunday, and I feel urged to write about it.  During a hypnotic past life regression in 2002 to get to the root (hopefully) of my very stubborn neck/head pain, I found myself back in Salem, MA during the famous…or infamous…Witch Trials.  I can still vividly “see” in my mind’s eye the stone walled, dark, damp jail cell I was held in for quite a while.  Although I was TOTALLY INNOCENT, I was someone who was interested in herbal medicine and things like that.  I would go into the woods and try to help sick animals.  I remember that what upset me so much, because I was kind of resigned about my fate, was hearing the cries, begging, screaming, and pleading of those who were taken out before me to be murdered.  I cannot bring myself to say “executed” because it was pure murder.  It was horrific and very hard to deal with while under hypnosis because I re-experienced every feeling and emotion.  I gave the date, July 19, 1692 while under hypnosis, also, which I later verified…thanks to the Internet.  Five of us were killed that horrid day.  I can still clearly remember standing up on this platform with a crowd down below me who jeered and mocked me.  I was very stoic and refused to cry or plead.  I looked at the crowd of “good Christians” and simply said, “May God forgive you for you do not know what you do”.  My hypnotherapist, Shawn Randall, was in trance during this so that her guide, Torah, actually led the regression.  The benefit of this was that Torah could also see everything I was reliving and we were able to compare notes later.  Torah quickly pulled me out of that life just after I dropped down and the noose tightened around my neck.  I choked for only a quick couple of seconds before I was safely out of that life.

Here are the markers in Salem for the 5 of us killed on July 19, 1692.  It’s hard for me to not cry just looking at them.  I happened to see a TV show where they went to explore Salem and I was overwhelmed with emotion and heartache just seeing the town.

http://www.salemweb.com/memorial/

http://www.findingdulcinea.com/news/on-this-day/July-August-08/On-this-Day–Five-Women-Hanged-in-Salem-for-Witchcraft.html

Where this gets even eerier is that while a friend was doing my genealogy a couple of years ago, she discovered that I have 2 relatives that actually took part in the Salem Witch Trials as witnesses!  One testified against an accused Witch and another testified for an accused Witch.  I was scared to look into whether or not the one who testified against an accused Witch had actually caused my death!  But, I finally looked into it…and…no…it was someone else the person had helped to convict.

I have been killed in numerous lives by my neck:  hanging, beheading (I deserved that one), strangulation during a jealous rage, shackled by the neck, and by a spear in the neck as a warrior Native American.  My neck injury on October 1, 1995 that has caused 24/7 pain ever since, has never responded to any treatment and doctors are dumbfounded by it.  It’s very stubborn about letting me release it.  I have a feeling there are even MORE lives where I’ve died due to my neck.  But, the Salem life is a biggie.  I may need to go there in order to release the trauma, but I’m nervous about it.  If I get upset just seeing it on TV…well…

When I learned about my Witch Trials life (and death) it totally explained why I’ve always gotten LIVID whenever anyone attacks someone for being Wiccan or into Witchcraft.  I have this overwhelming need to defend them to the death.  It also explains why I am very hostile toward Christianity.  I hope you can see why I’m not a fan of that religion (most religions, actually) and anyone who acts righteous, holier-than-thou, condemns, and feels he/she has the right to tell anyone else how they should live and what they should believe.  The spiritual paths that call me are Buddhism and Witchcraft, and I think that is because they are paths that teach personal experience and personal responsibility.  Buddhism isn’t really considered to be a religion, if I recall correctly.  It’s more of a life philosophy of non harm, and finding your own enlightenment through inner work.  And Witchcraft teaches not to cause harm, or it will come back to you threefold.  Don’t bring Satanism into this.  That is a whole different path.  If someone starts preaching anything to me, I simply don’t want to hear it.  If whatever it is works for you, great, but leave me alone.  I am a very spiritually based person and am quite content with my beliefs.  And I’ve had some pretty damn amazing experiences that would blow others’ minds.  I need to blog about them. 🙂

In the words of Rodney King, “Can’t we all just get along?”  Live and let live.  To each their own.  I’m going to spend this weekend trying to heal my soul from immense damage caused by ignorance, jealousy, and righteousness.  And, I’m going to help animals at a shelter…because that is what I would have done 323 years ago.

Blessed be,

Atheria

My 1st hypnotherapy session to deal with my panic/anxiety disorder…

I had my 1st session with Gloria today to hopefully cure my increasingly bad panic attacks. Before she even put me under, she interviewed me for quite a while about the long questionnaire I had filled out. She was torn because although some of my answers pointed to possible extraterrestrial abduction experiences, some of my answers didn’t. I went into this with an open mind as I’m not sure what is causing them. It could be my hypoglycemia. It could be peri-menopause (for which I started on herbs yesterday) related. It could be a past life trauma that is bubbling up to the surface now. It could be anything.

Before Gloria put me under hypnosis, she told me that I would be aware at all times during the session. For the most part, that was true. But, at one point I “left the building” and don’t remember even hearing her voice for a while. It was like I was there and aware and then POOF…gone. I didn’t know I was gone until there was this BRIGHT light shining in my face that felt like it had a consciousness to it. It brought me back into the normal hypnotic awareness level where I could hear Gloria, hear the clock ding-dong on the hour, etc. When I mentioned the bright light, she thought it could be the sun coming through the skylight, but I wasn’t really facing the right direction for that and this light was right in my face and intelligent. That’s the only way I can explain it. It was alive.

This session was to deal specifically with retraining me regarding the panic attacks, so she didn’t specifically try to investigate any possible ET abductions/encounters. She gave me a lot of suggestions that hopefully will kick in the next time I start to freak out.

She then told me to go back to when in my past I felt fear that was associated with my current panic attacks and without hesitation I was standing face to face with an ET! But then my logical mind kicked in and said, “Now you’re just making this up because you know she’s into ETs and UFOs.” So I forced the image to change into a black blanket that I could then dissolve as she instructed me to do with my fears. She then told me to go back further if there was another instance of fear that is affecting me and I went back to my childhood when during a bad fight my parents were having I ran out into the garage to get my bicycle to ride away on. Dad ran after me and locked me in the garage to try to calm me down and talk to me. It didn’t work and eventually he let me run off. Then Gloria told me to go back further if there was anything else that happened where I felt fear and I ended up in my mother’s womb. I don’t know why I felt fear in there, but I did. Maybe something was going on within her or something. (By the way, I didn’t verbalize anything while under hypnosis. I only talked afterward.)

When Gloria suggested I go back further, if there was anything else I needed to see, I saw a quick flash of a past life I know about during the Middle Ages or so where I was a peasant girl who had a love affair with the rich son of a powerful family. But, I only saw that life really quickly before I switched over to a good…at least I’ve always felt it was one of my better lives…life in Versailles, France. I started to watch the life when out from nowehere I’m suddenly in this field on the edge of woods…standing at the back of a good sized crowd of people as they were walking into a UFO that was sitting there! I’m watching humans go into a UFO! I assumed that meant that during the Versailles life I might have been abducted, but I’m not sure the clothing I saw the people wearing was of that era. I think the clothes were more modern, but can’t recall clearly now.

That scene didn’t last too long because (not knowing what I was seeing but witnessing me react physically to seeing it….my body squirmed and I kind of flinched and made noises) Gloria suggested that I see myself in a museum and witness my fear as a piece of art. When she said that, I saw the Mona Lisa. She asked me if the Mona Lisa resembled anything I was afraid of, but nothing came to mind. The Mona Lisa is in the Louvre in Paris, though, which, of course, is near Versailles.

Soon after that she brought me out of hypnosis and then had me tell her what I experienced and saw. I have to admit, I was caught off guard when that ET I was with face to face showed up after she asked me when I first felt fear…and then that UFO being loaded up with people showed up in the middle of a seemingly unrelated Versailles scene. Maybe there IS more going on than me just being a hormonal mess or hypoglycemic. Hoping that all the suggestions she made regarding me releasing the panic issue work, the next time she’d like to take me back to 1998 when I do believe I was taken twice while living in the Hollywood Hills. 1998 was an “interesting” year in many ways. It’s the year Taos called me to it (and I had a life altering spiritual experience nearby in Ojo Caliente) and the year I heard the voice that told me I wasn’t really Carrie Ryan, I was Atheria. It’s also the year I adopted my beloved Karma kitty…but that wasn’t odd. 🙂

As a side note, Gloria told me that I can indeed ask ETs to help heal my 17+ year long neck damage and headache hell. She said that if I keep repeating it to myself that I want their help, if I’m ever taken again, it’ll come to the forefront and they’ll do something about it. She also wants to see the old CT scans and X-rays I have of my neck and head after I told her a neurosurgeon in Santa Monica told me that the base of my skull is slightly malformed and that my cerebellum is huge…way bigger than an average person’s.

Well, until next time….

In light,
Carrie

What Goes Around, Comes Around

I found out some news late in the day that re-broke my heart regarding an ex I admit I’m not over. (Now I know why one of his ex’s that I knew about popped into my head strongly earlier today.) Well, he meant something to me…but it seems that I was just a convenient woman until he could move onto the next. What makes it so hard to get over him is the major soul connection we had and our history that went back hundreds of years. I can’t post that many details online, but a life that we had hundreds of years ago where he left me while I was pregnant was eerily mimicked in this life (except the pregnancy part, thank God). The dynamic of our current life situation was exactly like it was long ago. When I found out about it, it even freaked me out and I’m not easily freaked. I have gone over it and over it and over it trying desperately to figure out what I was supposed to learn from the experience of him doing to me again, what he did long ago. Quite frankly, I can’t see any lesson in it or any good that has come from it. As I was driving home from work and asking God "WHY did this have to happen again?! What am I to learn from being hurt by him all over again?!" all of a sudden Justin Timberlake’s What Goes Around came on the radio. I’m writing this post to re-confirm that our guides are always there and listening. I know that song was a sign from spirit that karma will indeed bite him in the ass and that he won’t get away with it unscathed. For those of you who don’t know the song, here it is: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TOrnUquxtwA

Trying to find peace,

Atheria