Those who know me know that I’m at the end of my rope health-wise (really, really tired of being in 24/7 pain with not much hope I’ll ever get out of head and neck pain), bored and lonely in Albuquerque, and “over” my day job that sucks the soul out of me but stuck in a city without many high paying, quality jobs. That being said, I actually AM grateful for the income that I have in this economy. I’ve been TRYING to relocate for over a year but hit closed door after closed door. Clearly the Universe does not want me going anywhere right now, which ticks me off. I’ve been feeling like I’m rotting and just biding my time…like I’m waiting to die. Isn’t THAT chipper?!
But, something is going on.
I haven’t been attending the Thursday evening meetings of Spirit Presents in a really long time, but got the urge to go to this past Thursday’s open circle practice session. I’m so out of practice with both mediumship and channeling that I didn’t know if anything would transpire. Well, stuff transpired. I was able to give messages from a mother/grandmother from Louisiana in spirit to this lovely mother/daughter duo. I think it was their first time attending too, which was nice. Plus, I also did trance work and gave everyone messages. There were 6 others besides me in the circle. When I asked another channel where I’m supposed to live (very conflicted about locations) she was blunt and said I’m supposed to be where I am. That was highly annoying! But, a few minutes before she gave me that message I had this funny feeling that the reason I’ve had no success finding jobs out of state is because I’m not supposed to leave New Mexico, at least not yet. So, she verified what I felt in my gut. Then, later during the evening, a tarot card reader had each of us pull a card for a mini reading and I drew the Ace of Wands. She said that my work is going to dramatically change and that I had to stop trying to force change and allow. Have I mentioned that I am not patient? She was very clear, though, that this would be a dramatic work change. Thank God!
Today I went to the monthly meeting of Albuquerque/Placitas Metaphysical and Spiritual Lyceum and just thought I’d contribute like a normal person to the meeting. Wrong. While listening to Karen, the publisher of Truly Alive, talk about the magazine I got the familiar heart thumping/racing feeling of going into trance. I struggled to hold my unseen friends back, but they were aggressive. Finally, William (the leader) pointed out that I was having a little episode and did I want to channel? In full trance a group came through to talk to Karen directly about the magazine and how I (they call me “the vessel”) was to help her get investors in Southern California. I also think I’m supposed to help her in other ways that are not yet clear. I’m not giving all the details of what they said, but I would love to help with the magazine if I can. Because I’m in so much head and neck pain, channeling today was VERY hard on me physically. It was very painful because my physical body gets extremely tense and contorts around. When the other group came through on Thursday, the transition was actually the easiest its ever been, but today’s group was a rougher. It’s like trying to squeeze 1,000 watts of energy into a 60 watt bulb! Ouch! I think I know why some mediums and channels (especially channels…Jane Roberts was a perfect example) don’t live long lives. It really IS hard on you, physically and energy/life force wise.
There is a remote chance I may be moving back to Southern California in early 2016 to work at a television production company a friend (and ex Sony Pictures coworker) now works for. I have a weird feeling about it…that IF it happens, it’s going to open doors for my true metaphysical work. And, it could give me access to people that could help Truly Alive to thrive. Time will tell, but I’ve got a “feeling”. If that isn’t to be, I do feel STRONGLY that things are shifting here in Albuquerque for me and that I’m being gradually moved onto my true path. As I blogged earlier today, I will be the guest speaker on November 21st at the NM UFO/Paranormal Forum. At least a door has opened for me! It gets exhausting pounding against closed doors. I’m going to TRY to do more allowing as the tarot card reader/psychic told me on Thursday and stop trying to force my life to move in some specific direction. This is not an easy task for me, but really, what I’ve been doing is not working. Taoism is the way I guess.
Thanks for listening to my rambling. Truly Alive is a GREAT resource for healing and other articles, by the way. Check it out, and if you know of funding help, please don’t hesitate to contact Karen or me. It’s a magazine that is trying to spread light and do good in the world, and God knows our planet needs help right now.