As those around me know, I have been going through some serious depression lately. I have been feeling very lonely (for good reason…I’m alone most of the time and have few friends in Albuquerque), lost, directionless, unloved, BORED to death, and I’ve had no interest in anything anymore for the most part. I quit going to CNM part-time for a degree I had no interest in but one which my employer would pay for. I quit going to acupuncture. I’ve been quitting a lot. I have felt like I’m just biding time, waiting to die. Doesn’t that just sound chipper? Anyway, days ago, I begged God/Great Spirit to please give me some direction…bring me my true work…bring me something to get excited about. I asked for help.
Well, totally out-of-the-blue on Tuesday I got a meetup.com invitation to join an acting class. I’ve not been in an acting class in a very long time. But, something about the out-of-the-blue nature of the email and the guy who is in charge of organizing the class for the acting teacher made me feel good about it. I’ve not committed to taking the class yet due to cost, but I may join for a while just to get back into doing something I used to love to do. More importantly, because of that email, I saw a link to some other sites and clicked on the http://nmfilm.com site and when I looked at the casting notices, I saw an ad for a SAG short film. The casting director was looking for a busy-body cat lady (OMG, perfect casting!) for one scene in the film and asked actors to make a video of themselves doing the scene which would then be uploaded to YouTube and linked to the Facebook page for the film. I thought, “What the heck? I’ve not acted in a long time, but I’ll make a video and see what happens.” I submitted my video audition Tuesday night and was told on Wednesday that they liked my scene and have a callback for the role tomorrow afternoon! Now, whether or not I get the acting job, what this has done is triggered me to want to get back into the acting biz. I set aside a large part of who I am years ago when I quit the business due to being a woman of a certain age and not getting anywhere. I am fully convinced this SAG film (and the acting class, possibly) were sent from my friends on the Other Side/God in answer of my plea for direction and help. I finally have an interest in something again.
But things get weirder. Today, I got a message on Facebook from a guy I didn’t know inviting me to The Monroe Institute’s Albuquerque Meditation Group…and he mentioned that they needed a chapter leader for Albuquerque. Now, for those who don’t know about the work of Robert Monroe, you MUST look him up and read some of his books on astral travel/out-of-body exploration. His books are fascinating! In the late 1990’s, I really wanted to learn how to astral travel at will (after reading his books and the books by William Buhlman) and tried every night for days and days to trigger myself to leave my body according to some simple exercises you were supposed to do. Well, I’m not known for my patience, and when nothing happened after 2 weeks or so, I gave up and forgot about it. A couple of days later as I was drifting off to sleep, I suddenly felt myself sinking through my sofa bed toward the floor. I went through the mattress! But, because I felt a sinking feeling instead of what I assumed should be a rising feeling, I totally panicked. The moment that I felt fear, BOOM! I was yanked back up into my body quickly. I had felt fear because I thought I was dying as no one had said that sometimes when you start to leave your body for astral travel, the feeling can be like you are sinking. If I’d known that I probably wouldn’t have been afraid and it would have worked. I was so mad at myself for messing it up.
I have always wanted to go to The Monroe Institute in Virginia, but didn’t have the time and money to go for an extended period of time. I cannot help but feel that this offer to join an Albuquerque Monroe group and possibly be the leader is also divine intervention. I learned long ago, then when doors unexpectedly show up and easily open…I need to walk through them. I do greatly miss the group of women I used to meet with every Tuesday in Los Angeles where we practiced channeling. I literally verbalized to a couple of people lately how much I miss that weekly practice session. Perhaps something similar will come from a group of people gathering here in Albuquerque to meditate using resources to alter brain waves that Robert Monroe developed. Here is a link to the Monroe Institute site where you can listen to some FASCINATING recordings of people in trance states induced by Robert’s sounds/equipment: http://www.monroeinstitute.org/resources/downloads/cat/explorer-series
I think being able to research from out-of-body and get answers to life’s mysteries would be awesome!
What I’d like to get across from this blog is that when you ask for help, and then weird unexpected doors open for you…PAY ATTENTION. Things come into your life, especially when out-of-the-blue, for a good reason. Call it divine intervention. Call it guidance.